Microsoft’s GitHub code repository is a central dependency for open source software. Corporate development teams love it too.
But GitHub’s been having serious reliability problems lately — 86% uptime over the past 90 days. [Missing GitHub Status]
We don’t have direct smoking gun evidence that GitHub is dying of vibe code poisoning. But it sure feels vibe coded. Sucks if you work for a company trying to use GitHub for real work, hey.
But GitHub has competitors. The largest has long been GitLab, founded in 2011.
So GitLab has seized the day! And they’ve announced they’re going to shoot themselves in the foot too. With AI!
Yesterday, CEO Bill Staples posted “GitLab Act 2”: [GitLab]
The agentic era affords GitLab the largest opportunity in our history as a company, and we’re making the structural and strategic decisions to meet it.
You can translate that, right? He means layoffs. Announcements like this say “AI” to mean layoffs. You always go into your “largest opportunity” with less people, right.
Staples’ AI excuse for the layoffs is full agentic orchestration with all the salad. His full pitch sounds like Gas Town for Enterprise and should be about as efficient and effective:
Software will be built by machines, directed by people. AI is the substrate on which future software gets built. Agents will plan, code, review, deploy, and repair. Humans still own the judgment that matters most: architecture, deep understanding of the customer problem, the tradeoffs that require taste.
Of course, they won’t. The human in the loop rapidly acclimatises to management demands for 10× productivity by turning into a “looks good to me” machine and accepting anything that passes CI. The management get precisely what they asked for. The human fantasises about getting a physical labouring job.
I don’t believe GitLab is going to do any of the agentic guff in this announcement — it’s just C-level fever dreams. They will do the layoffs, though.
GitLab’s stock price was $52 a year ago and closed at $25.64 yesterday — so it dropped by over half in a year. It closed at $23.08 today — a 9% drop in one day. So the market does not love this clear desperation AI layoff either. And we already know that layoffs don’t boost your share price, they send it down.
This was a very weird and dumb announcement from GitLab, especially when this was the perfect moment to advertise “we’re the one that stays up and works” and tune up their migration tools. But they have CEO brain, so let’s try saying “AI”!
So what do we move to instead? Codeberg is run by a nonprofit and a lot of open source projects are going there.
Business users are mostly holding on and hoping GitHub gets it together. There’s also self-hosting a code repository with Forgejo, the open source software that Codeberg maintains and runs on.
But sometimes, services turn to vibe trash, and you have to rebuild from scratch yourself. You’ll get a lot of practice when the AI bubble’s finished popping.






















